Halfway to Forever
by hopeandlove23
Summary: After a terrifying accident that causes Nathan to go into a deep coma for five years, he wakes up to find everything changed. Everything, including his loving relationship with Haley. A classic tale of love lost and maybe, hopefully, love found.
1. Prologue Chapter 1

**AN: Hello. I'm new to but not new to writing stories. I actually posted this story on another site as well but this is a new story I have started. Its a bit short but hopefully you guys like it and give me some feedback! **

**PS The parts in first person is from NATHANS POV and then there are other parts in third person as well. Mostly, it's in NATHANS POV. Also, ITALICS MEANS FLASHBACKS. Enjoy :) I DONT OWN ANYTHING  
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Prologue

I was dreaming.

She was lying down in a field of grass. The sun was high in the sky and the rays of light touched her face and it seemed as if she was glowing. The light breeze made the ends of her dress dance across her legs and the tendrils of her hair tickle her cheeks. I could see that her eyes were closed and when I came closer I saw that there was a small smile upon her lips.

I sat down next to her wanting to touch her so badly.

"Nathan?" she said, with her eyes still closed.

"I'm right here."

Her smile widened. "It's time for you to wake up now, baby."

I leaned back so that I was lying down. I turned so that I was facing her, and then I propped my head on my hand. "I want to stay with you for a little longer."

Her eyes finally opened and she turned them my way. She had the most sweetest eyes I've ever seen. She reached out and placed her hand on my cheek. "No. Open your eyes now so you can come back to us."

I took her hand and kissed it softly. "Will you still be with me when I do?"

The smile slowly died on her lips. She leaned over and kissed me softly. "Just open your eyes."

I opened my eyes and finally came back to reality.

...

Chapter 1.

I opened my eyes and everything looked so blurry. I didn't know where I was or how I even got here. Gradually things became clearer. I was aware that I was lying down with needles in my arms. Just the sight of it made me more woozy. I hated needles. The needles and the hospital bed gave me an obvious clue as to where I was. But that didn't erase my confusion.

A woman came in the room, someone unfamiliar, and when she saw me, she gasped. She immediately left but not before I heard her say "he's awake."

And then everything happened so fast. More people came in, gathering around my bed, peering down at me.

A man leaned down closer and asked, "Do you know your name?"

I opened my mouth to answer but for some reason I came up short. Seconds ticked by as I tried to remember.

He turned to one of the women surrounding me. "Get me another nurse."

"Yes, doctor," she replied.

I looked around me, looking at these people. I couldn't recognize any of them. "What am I doing here?" I asked the man who I guessed was my doctor.

"His heart rate is going up," a nurse said.

I didn't notice that my heart was beating rapidly. I began to panic. I saw that a nurse was injecting something into an iv tube in my arm. Things became blurry again. I heard them talking but their words was just one big blur. My eyes were getting heavy and then instantly, I went back to sleep.

...

I woke up and saw a nurse adjusting the monitor. And then she leaned over to adjust my pillow.

_She leaned over and adjusted the pillows I was laying down on, feeling her long blond hair tickle my cheeks as she did so. I smiled._

_"You know, you don't have to keep babying me. I'm fine," I said._

_She just smiled. "I just want you to be comfortable, Nathan." She leaned over and gave me a soft kiss._

"Nathan," I said to myself. I smiled and turned to the nurse. "My name's Nathan."

She smiled and put her hand on top of mine. "Welcome back, Nathan."

"How long have I been out?" I asked.

"Since you woke up? Well, you've been in and out of consciousness for about two weeks."

Two weeks? It felt as if I've only been out for a day. I still couldn't remember how I got here. All I wanted was to see familiar faces. I wanted to see—

_"Why are you looking at me like that?" she said._

_"What? I can't look at you?" I responded._

_She shrugged, although she was clearly squirming under my gaze. "I don't know. It's like you're looking at me as if I'm holding the whole world."_

_I paused and continued to look at her. She was so beautiful. Her eyes. Her smile. Her laugh. The way she was biting her lip as I continued to stare. Everything she is, everything she did mesmerized me. "You are my whole world," I said finally._

_She smiled and placed her hand on my cheek, caressing me softly. "That was the cheesiest thing I ever heard. But I love you."_

_"I love you, too, Haley."_

"Haley," I said softly to myself.

"Pardon?" the nurse asked.

"Haley. My fiancé. Where is she?" I asked, a little desperate, knowing that seeing her again would make everything okay.

The nurse gave me a sad smile and squeezed my hand. "Why don't I get you something to eat?"

...

Haley was in the kitchen when she heard her phone ring. Putting down the knife she was using to make dinner, she picked up the phone.

"Hello?"

"Haley?"

Haley smiled when she heard Brooke's voice on the other line. Ever since the accident, Brooke was always there for her, doing everything she could to help her out. Brooke became one of her dearest and closest friends. "Hey, Brooke. What's up?" Haley asked.

"I think you'd better sit down," Brooke said, her voice a little shaky.

Haley heard the nervousness in Brooke's voice, immediately alarming her. "Brooke, what's wrong?"

"Nathan's awake." All Brooke heard on the other line was a gasp and the drop of a phone.


	2. Chapter 2

**AN: Hey guys! Thank you so much for the replies. I'm incredibly happy you guys responded so well! Here's chapter 2 and I'm sorry if this chapter is a little slow, but I wanted you guys to know the basics and background of what happened with Nathan and his reaction to everything. But trust me, the best part is yet to come! So thank you guys times a million. Enjoy!**

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Chapter 2

"Your results are looking pretty good, Nathan. Actually, they're incredible," Dr. West said. "I've never seen anyone recover so quickly."

"Uh-huh," I said. I had already told them I was fine, that I was ready to go home to be with my family.

I've been here for a month. A month of horrible hospital food, a month of being coddled and fussed over, a month of tests and medication, a month of bed rest… I just wanted to go home. By now, I remembered most of what happened during the accident.

And by now, I remembered who I was, who my friends and family were. I knew that my name was Nathan Scott. I lived in Tree Hill, North Carolina. I played point guard for the Charlotte Bobcats. Or did.

"Nathan," Dr. West said patiently, "I don't think you fully understand how amazing this truly is. Usually it would take someone who was in your condition more than two or three years to recover what you had already did in a month. That's truly remarkable."

West was a good guy. He was the most diligent and caring man I've ever met. Surprisingly, he was the person I saw the most during my stay here. He would sit down and talk to me. About anything: movies, books, sports. You name it. He became a friend.

"So does that mean I get to leave any time soon?" I asked.

He gave me a wary sigh. "Yes and no. I still want to run more tests to figure out why it is you're recovering so quickly." He walked closer to me and put his hand on top of mine. "I'm happy for you, Nathan. You don't know how grateful I am to know that you're okay."

He was like a father to me. And I appreciated everything he did.

"I think I'm about to cry now," I said sarcastically but I smiled. His words meant more to me than he could ever know.

West chuckled, a nice, hearty sound that was totally perfect coming from someone like him. After a few more minutes of chatting, he left me alone, relieved that I was doing so well.

During my stay here, I always looked forward to when family and friends came to visit. It was mostly because I was bored out of my mind.

Lucas and Peyton were the ones who visited me first, along with my mother. Lucas and Peyton already married and had a two-year-old daughter. Her name was Sawyer and she was beautiful.

Julian and Brooke also visited me a couple of times, and I was a bit surprised to know that they were together. Before the accident, Brooke would always complain about how Julian was a stuck up son of a bitch who was only in it for the sex.

Damn it, I missed so much. Five years. Missing five years was like missing a lifetime. I could still feel the pain when West first told me what happened.

_"You got into a serious car accident, Nathan," Dr. West said._

_I drew my eyebrows together, trying to assess it all. "A car accident?"_

_Dr. West nodded solemnly. "You ended up banging your head quite harshly against the side window, causing a concussion. The impact was just too great. " West looked at Nathan was sad eyes. "You fell into a coma."_

A coma_. All of this felt so surreal, like I was in a bad dream and all I needed to do was wake up. But knowing that I was gone? Knowing that my family and friends were sick with worry, wondering if I would ever wake up at all? Words couldn't even describe the hurt I was feeling right now.  
_

_Finally, after West had explained to me what had happened, I was forced to ask him the most important question._

_I hesitated at first because I was scared to know. Truth be told, I was terrified. "How long—" I stopped to clear my throat because I felt it close up, "—how long have I been in a coma?" I said unsteadily. It couldn't have been that long. A few weeks, maybe a month or so._

_West reverted his gaze to look down at the floor. "Five years," he said, so softly I shouldn't have been able to have heard him. But I did and a rush of pain began to swell in my chest._

_"I'm sorry, Nathan."_

_Five years? Five damn years I've been away? It was impossible. It didn't feel like five years. Hell, it didn't even feel like a week. It wasn't fair. It wasn't fair to me, to my mother, to Lucas and Peyton and Brooke… and most of all, it wasn't fair to Haley. _

_I wanted to murder the son of a bitch who did this to me._

_"Everything is going to be okay, Nathan," Dr. West said sadly. "It just takes time."_

_Nothing will ever give me back what I had lost. Not even time._

…

I was updated with everything. What was going on, what was new, who was with who, who _did_ who. Everything was so different, I almost didn't believe it. It was strange because I knew everything that was now going on with everybody except for what was going on with Haley. No one wanted to tell me anything about her, what she had been doing for the past five years, or who she was now.

At first I was worried that something bad might've happened to her but Brooke reassured me that she was fine. But if she was fine, why hadn't she visited me already? She must've known that I wanted to see her...

Damn it, it hurt so badly. I ached for her. I wanted to see her smile. I wanted to hear her laugh. I wanted to feel her touch…

It didn't make sense. But all they just told me was that she wasn't ready to see me. And I've accepted that. I just hope that I didn't have to wait too long.

_I loved the way she looked when she was sleeping, especially after we had made love. Her hair was fanned against the pillows, the blanket strewn across her chest, with the promise of slipping away to reveal what I consider one of the most precious parts of her._

_She always slept with a slight smile on her face, like whatever she was dreaming was responsible for putting it there._

_I was perfectly content just watching her. Watching the way her chest moved up and down when she breathed, or listen to her soft snores— which she claimed she didn't do—or watching the way her skin glowed against the candlelight. God, everything about her was so beautiful._

_As I gently brushed a tendril of hair away from her face, I realized that this was the woman I wanted to spend the rest of my life with. Even though we had only been together for a few months, I felt like I knew her all my life. I knew that this was the woman I loved so deeply. So desperately._

_Feeling my touch, Haley woke, slowly opening her eyes. When she saw me, she smiled. "Hi," she said softly, with the trace of sleep still in her voice._

_"I'm sorry, did I wake you?" I said, caressing her cheek._

_She stretched and made a slight moaning sound that made me want to take her all over again. She shook her head. "No. I had the most amazing dream."_

_"Oh yeah? About what?"_

_She moved closer to me and began to trace lazy circles on my chest. "Mmm... about you. And me."_

_"And?"_

_She shrugged. "And we were just together. Holding each other. Is it weird that I feel so happy just because I dreamed of that?"_

_I shook my head. "No. Not really." I smiled._

_She groaned. "You probably think I'm a complete dork, don't you?"_

_"Well, yeah. But that's okay," I teased. "I think it's cute."_

_She buried her face in the pillows, embarrassed. "You're such a jerk," she muffled._

_I laughed. And then after a while, when she calmed down and was in my arms again, I said, "I love you." It was my first time telling her and it was such a relief finally letting it out. I wanted to tell it to her a million times and then a million times over._

_Her eyes were closed but she smiled. I hugged her tighter. "I love you," I repeated, "You know that right?"_

_She snuggled deeper into my arms. "I know," she said finally. She placed a soft kiss on my chest, just above my heart. I knew then that I didn't even need to ask her. I already knew she loved me too. _

…

"Knock, knock," a familiar voice said.

I looked up and smiled. "Brooke."

"Hey, Nate. Can I come in?" she asked.

I nodded and when she came inside, I immediately drew her into my arms. She smiled and sat down next to me. "How are you?"

"Pretty well, I think. Dr. West told me that my recovery is top notch. I should be coming home soon." Home always meant Haley. Now I wasn't so sure anymore.

"That's great, Nathan. All of us can't wait until you do. Lucas and Peyton have a big welcome home party and everything."

I nodded slowly. "How's Haley?" I wanted to know more than anything.

Brooke hesitated as she always did whenever I mentioned her. "She's fine."

"Brooke…"

"Nathan, you just need to be patient. She'll come around. She's just n—"

"Not ready to see me. I know. It's just hard. Wouldn't you think that she'd be the first person to come see me when I woke up?"

She nodded. "Yes but Nathan, it's been five years…"

"What does that have to do with anything?" I snapped. "I love her and she loves me. That couldn't have changed could it?"

Brooke stayed silent for a moment. I sighed and took her hand. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to take my anger out on you. I'm just so frustrated. And it hurts, you know?"

"She's hurting too, Nathan." She squeezed my hand. "Just hang in there buddy. She'll come around."

"Thank you, Brooke. For coming here. For everything. And not just you, but Luke and Peyton and everybody else. " I shrugged. "I don't know what I'd do without you guys."

"You know we love you, Nate. We're just so happy you're back."

After a few hours of chatting and more catching up, Brooke left. She updated me with more news about Tree Hill. There was now a new building in Tree Hill High dedicated solely for music. The new principle was a prick. Karen, Lucas' mother, allowed Brooke to change her café into a boutique. Sawyer's favorite word was "shit" after over hearing Peyton accidentally blurt it out, although when said, it comes out as "shint". Lucas was in the process of writing a new book, and she and Julian are planning on getting married.

I still couldn't believe how different everything was. I still couldn't believe how I missed so much. I shook my head and reached to get a cup of water but ended up accidentally knocking it down to the floor.

"Shit," I muttered under my breath.

As I leaned down to retrieve the cup, I heard someone enter. At first I thought it was Brooke, thinking that maybe she forgot something. But when I sat up, I froze.

When our eyes met, I felt as if my heart stopped. We continued to stare at each other. For how long, I didn't know. Seconds ticked by. Minutes. Hours.

She finally broke the silence. "Hi," she said softly but unsteadily.

There she was, in front of my eyes. Maybe I wanted her to be there so badly that somehow my mind was starting to make me see illusions of her. Nevertheless, I caught my breath. A million thoughts were running through my head, and there were a million more things I wanted to say.

"Haley," I breathed out.

I felt as if I was whole again.


	3. Chapter 3

**AN: Hi guys! Thanks for the replies again ") it makes me truly happy knowing that you guys are enjoying this. This chapter is a bit short as well and mostly a flashback. I'll have chapter four up by tomorrow. Enjoy :)**

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Chapter 3

_I didn't know who she was but the moment I laid my eyes on her, I made it my mission to find out._

_I was at a frat party that Lucas dragged me to against my better judgment. As pathetic as it sounded, I wanted to stay home and sulk at the fact that I didn't get drafted._

_"C'mon, Nate," Lucas prodded. "It's Christmas. Why stay here alone—like a loser, might I add—when you could be going out and having fun with friends?"_

_The next thing I knew I was at a frat house, a beer shoved into my hands right when I walked in, and girls throwing me come-hither looks. I pretended not to notice. Over here, someone was either drinking, dancing, making out, or having sex._

_"Having fun yet?" Lucas smiled as he sipped his beer._

_"This place blows."_

_"That's the spirit."_

_Lucas scanned the room. "There are the ladies." He nodded his head towards them._

_I saw Brooke and Peyton laughing and talking as usual, except, they had someone else with them. I've never seen her before. But seeing her was like a blow to the gut. I've seen a lot of hot, sexy women before but her beauty…it was soft. Sophisticated, almost. She was lovely and I was mesmerized._

_And her smile… it was beautiful._

_I nodded my head in her direction. "Who's that?"_

_"Who's who?"_

_"The girl with Brooke and Peyton."_

_Lucas averted his attention back to them, and saw who I was talking about. "Oh. That's Haley. She just moved here from California but Peyton and Brooke are so taken with her already."_

_"Huh." I sipped my beer as I continued to look at her._

_"She's not hard on the eyes, either." Lucas nudged me with his arm. "But she's off limits."_

_I lifted a brow. "Why?"_

_Lucas shrugged. "Heard she hates boys."_

_"So that means she likes girls?" I said sarcastically._

_"No, smartass. She got her heart broken more than a couple of times and now she thinks all guys are pigs."_

_I returned my attention to her. "Really."_

_"You weren't thinking of trying to start something were you?" Lucas asked incredulously. "She's not your type."_

_"What's that supposed to mean?"_

_Lucas shot me a you've-got-to-be-kidding-me-look. "She's a good girl. She doesn't take shit from anybody."_

_"And that's not my type?"_

_"No, your type is someone who would get into bed with you at the drop of a hat and do what you say with no questions asked."_

_I rolled my eyes. He did have a point though but something about her was different. It was like I was drawn to her. It was like something was pulling me towards her._

_After a while, Lucas met up with Brooke and Peyton while I stepped outside. It was dark out, and the stars were the only light that I could see. I sat down on one of the swings that was there, and looked up. Somehow, watching the stars gave me a sense of peace. I was able to be alone with my thoughts. And maybe, just maybe, I would be lucky and see a shooting star._

_"Oh, I'm sorry," someone said suddenly from behind me. "I didn't realize anyone was here."_

_I turned and I immediately locked eyes with a pair of chocolate browns. There she was. So lovely just standing there, looking apologetic for something she had no absolute reason to be sorry for._

_"There's no need. There's plenty of space for the both of us." I smiled._

_"Are you sure? I assume you want to be alone."_

_I shook my head. "Unless you want me to leave so you can—"_

_She immediately shook her head. "No. It's fine." She walked over and sat down on the swing next to me. Like me, once she sat down she immediately looked up at the sky._

_"Looking for shooting stars?" I asked. She had long blond hair, but during the past hour or so, she had put it up in a neat ponytail which only made her look younger than her age. Younger, but beautiful all the same._

_She smiled. "Maybe. Is that so bad?"_

_"Not at all. We all need wishes here and there." Why couldn't I take my eyes off of her? I quickly turned my attention back to the sky before she noticed my prolonged gaze._

_She sighed. "What I would give to have just one."_

_"What would you wish for? Jewelry? New clothes? A car?" I teased._

_Her eyes never left the sky but she just smiled and shook her head._

_I stopped talking because it seemed like she wanted to be alone with her thoughts. The silence emerged between us but it wasn't awkward or uncomfortable. It was just perfect._

_"When I was little, my father used to drag me outside with our telescope so we can look at the stars," she said finally. When she spoke, it was like she was in a dreamy trance, like she whatever she was saying she was saying it more to herself. It was like she didn't know I was even there._

_She continued. "Every single night at exactly eight o' clock, we would try to find different constellations. I didn't care for it, really. I mean, the stars were great and everything but what I loved the most was sharing something with my father that no one could take away. It was like our thing, you know? And no one else."_

_I nodded my head. "Do you still do that with your dad? I mean I know not every night but often?"_

_She took her eyes away from the sky and looked down. "No. He died a few years ago."_

_She caught me by surprise. I didn't know what to do. Should I hold her? Put my arm around her?_

_"I'm sorry," I said._

_"Don't be. It's not your fault." She looked back up at the sky. "If I had one wish, it would be to see my father again, to be able to be there with him at precisely eight o'clock watching out for Orion or the Big Dipper."_

_What I didn't see was her strong exterior, the one I assumed Lucas was telling me about. What I saw was someone so fragile, that one touch could break her._

_She shook her head suddenly and cleared her throat. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pour my heart out like that." She let out a nervous chuckle. "You must think I'm pretty pathetic, huh."_

_"No. That's far from what I think actually." I smiled softly. "If I ever I see a shooting star, I'll wish that you could see your father again, too."_

_She looked at me for a while, staring into my eyes, judging if I was genuine or not. Judging whether or not I was a good guy. It seemed like a lifetime passed by until she finally smiled._

_"I don't even know your name," she said._

_"Nathan," I said._

_"Haley. Haley James."_

_For some reason I had this goofy smile on my face that normally I would've controlled. "Hi," I said._

_She looked at me again and time stood perfectly still._

_"Hi," she said, ever so softly._

_I had no idea that this girl was going to change my life._

_Most of all, I had no idea that I was going to fall desperately, inexplicably, and hopelessly in love with her._

…

_You can do this, Haley. Just walk in. What's the worst that could happen?_ Haley walked slowly to room 102A, the room where Nathan was staying. The closer she got, the harder it was for her to breathe.

_Five years. I haven't seen him in five years_. Five years was too long to not be able to see the one you loved. Five years was more than she could bear.

She stopped just outside his room, making sure he didn't see her but she definitely saw him.

Haley caught her breath. And there he was. _Nathan_.

She couldn't believe it. God, she wanted to run inside and hold him and kiss him and tell him how relieved she was that he was finally awake. She wanted to tell him how miserable she was without him and how she hoped every night that the next day he would finally open his eyes.

But she couldn't, and her pain only worsened.

He looked different. Much thinner but more mature. He was still so handsome. She could've stayed there hidden just watching him. She considered doing just that and then leaving but she wasn't a coward. The moment she found out he was awake, she wanted to rush to the hospital and see him. She didn't, and couldn't because she was afraid. She was afraid that once she saw him, everything would change.

Now, after a month had gone by, it was time to see him. It was time to see her first love once again.


	4. Chapter 4

**AN: Hey guys :) Thank you times a million for the replies. It really makes my day knowing that you guys are sticking by this story. I hope I don't disappoint you. And to KTxx, I can't believe you teared up! :) for some reason that makes me happy knowing that this story touched you, or so I think. LOL! Thanks for the replies. Hope you all had a good christmas. And to mg, about your question on whether the last part was a flashback. No, it wasn't. It was in third person, and Haley was thinking to herself before she entered Nathan's room in the hospital. I'm sorry that it confused you. **

**And another note, just to clear things up, like a huge section in italics means its a flashbacks. not every single thing i put in italics is a flashback. for example a sentence or a word or whatever. if i put italics of a word or a single sentence, it's merely for emphasis. if you guys want me to change it so that all flashbacks are italics AND bold so it won't be confusing, please let me know!  
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**here's chapter 4. enjoy :)**

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Chapter 4

She looked different. Older. But I could recognize her anywhere. She was finally here and I should've been happy but I couldn't help but feel angry that she waited this long.

I continued to look into her eyes. She was still waiting for me to respond. I wanted to get up and walk to her so I could hold her, so I could kiss her and tell her how much I loved her.

"Hey," I said. _Let me hold you. Let me keep you safe in my arms again._

"How are you?" she asked softly.

"I've had better days," I said, hoping to see that smile of hers again.

I didn't and she continued to stay by the door.

"You look g—" she stopped to clear her throat. "You look good."

Why did I feel as if a stranger was standing in front of me? Why did I feel as if I didn't know this person at all?

She finally came closer and sat down next to me by the bed. I saw her hand move to reach out to take mines but she quickly changed her mind and placed them on her lap.

"How are you?" I asked, not wanting to ever take my eyes off her.

She exhaled deeply as if she had been holding her breath. "I'm okay. I, um, I'm the new English teacher at Tree Hill high." She started playing with her fingers, a sign indicating that she was nervous.

I smiled. "That's great."

"And um, I bought a new house a year ago. I didn't think I'd be ready for it but—"

"God, you're so beautiful," I said, interrupting her.

She smiled weakly but sadly. "Nathan…"

"Why did it take you so long to come here? I've been waiting for you." I looked into her eyes and all I saw was sadness.

She looked down and shook her head. "I know. I'm sorry."

I reached out and took her hand and when I did, a jolt went through my body, waking it up. I knew she felt the same way because she withdrew her hand.

"What happened, Hales? What's wrong?" All of a sudden I saw a single tear run down her cheek.

"You know, you're the only one who calls me that," she said, with tears in her voice.

I was confused but I wanted to take her in my arms and wipe away her tears. "I know, baby, I know."

Tears continued to run down her cheeks. "No, Nathan. You don't understand. Only _you_ can call me that. People have called me that before, whether on purpose or by accident. But every time they did I would get so angry and tell them to never call me that again."

I reached out and tried to touch her again but she quickly drew away and stood.

"It hurt." She shrugged sadly. "It just hurt too much hearing that nick name. It reminded me too much of you. It was like the pain I felt that night of the accident came back every time I heard it. It reminded me that you weren't here…that you were gone."

"I'm here now, Hales. And I'm not going anywhere."

"It's been five years, Nathan," she choked out. "I sat down beside you every single day for months just hoping, _prayin_g that you would just wake up so you could come back to me."

"Haley…"

"The doctors told me that you weren't going to wake up, that the chances of you doing so were slim to none. God, I wanted to kick and scream and tell them to go to hell. But months passed, and then months eventually turned into years." She ran her hand through her hair. "And then I knew that they were right. There wasn't any hope. You were gone."

"I'm sorry, Haley." Everything would be all right now. I was back and I loved her more than ever. It was time for us to be happy again. I was here now, I was here to take all her pain away.

"I love you, Haley," I said. "I love you so much."

Haley looked into my eyes but there was no happiness. No comfort. Just pain. "Oh, Nathan…"

"You don't have to hurt anymore, Hales. I'm sorry for what I put you through but I'll make it up to you. We can—"

Haley shook her head. "We can't," she whispered.

I drew my eyebrows together. "What're you talking about? I mean I know you're still hurting. I know you've waited so long but we love each other. There's no reason why we can't—"

"I'm married, Nathan," she blurted.

At first I thought I didn't hear her right but how could I confuse those words for something else? The breath was knocked out of me. I didn't want to believe it. I couldn't.

This pain I felt... it was different. It was on a whole different level. It was like the thing that I was searching for my whole life, the one thing I found and kept and held onto for dear life was stripped away from me. I felt the world around me spin. It was like someone took a dagger and pierced my heart over and over again. It was like my heart was torn out of my chest that very moment and was shattered into a million pieces all at once. Worst of all, it was Haley who was the one who did just that.

I was praying so badly that this was just a horrible dream. That all I needed to do was wake up and then Haley would be there, telling me that she loved me, that she waited for me so we would be together again.

_We were lying down on the bed, holding eachother. No foreplay. No sex. Just lying down in eachother's arms._

_I looked down at her, caressing her cheek. "Do you love me?" I asked._

_She looked up. "You can't imagine," she said softly._

_I smiled. "Forever, right?" Haley nodded. I held her tighter. "Say it."_

_"I'll love you forever, Nathan Scott."_

"I'm sorry," Haley said. "Nathan, please say something."

I looked up at her. Her hair was still the same as it was five years ago, long and blond. Her eyes were as brown as before. But her smile… I couldn't find it.

The way she carried herself, the way she spoke. She was different. This was why no one wanted to tell me about what was going on with her. She was married and it wasn't their place to tell me. It was Haley's. I was a fool to ever believe she would wait for me, that she would still feel the same way. Five years was just too long.

"Forever, right?" I said sadly.

Haley put her hand to her chest. "Nathan, I'm sorry," she repeated. "Please try to understand. I didn't know you were going to wake up, I thought you were—"

"Just go," I said softly. "Please."

Haley nodded, tears still in her eyes. I watched my love walk away and she took my heart with her.

…

Haley walked quickly down the hallway to the elevator.

_Breathe, Haley. Just breathe._

She didn't think she would lose herself like this. It wasn't supposed to be that way. She wasn't supposed to tell him that way. Damn it, why did it feel like she couldn't breathe?

She collapsed against the wall just beside the elevator. She drew up her knees and put her head in between them.

He was so perfect. So beautiful and wonderful. Just like how he was five years ago. She still saw the same twenty-two-year-old who stole her heart…and still had it.

Haley drew her head back up and banged it lightly against the wall. "Pull yourself together. You've moved on, Haley. You can't love him anymore."

She shook her head and stood up. Five years was just five years too late. She had to move on. And she would.

"I did," Haley told herself. But inside, she was falling apart.

But inside, she knew she still loved him.

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**Surprised right? and to SHAUN and KTxx, yes she was married. I hope you guys don't hate me and will stop reading but this is a NALEY fic. Trust me. :) I'll have chapter 5 up soon!**


	5. Chapter 5

**AN: Hello lovlies. I'm back with another update! I want to thank EVERYONE for the replies. I appreciate every single one of them no matter how critical it is! :) I wish I could do personal replies but I just don't have the time. I will next time though, promise :) so hopefully you guys keep reading and thanks for the support. you guys are amazing. **

**enjoy!**

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Chapter 5

West walked in while I was stretching out my legs. I stood and walked to the window. It was raining. It had been raining for a couple of days now. There was no other perfect weather to match my mood.

"How are you feeling, Nathan?" he asked me.

Like someone had just punched me to a pulp. "Fine," I said.

"Well, I think you're going to be feeling much better in a second."

I turned around to find West smiling. I nodded my head towards him. "What happened?"

"You get to go home."

Hearing those words, I should've been jumping for joy. I should've walked over to Dr. West and kissed his feet. I should've been running around the whole hospital screaming_, YES!_ But hearing that I could go home just made me even more sad than I already was. I knew that when I went home, Haley wouldn't be there waiting for me.

"Why do you look as if I just told you bad news?" he asked me.

I shook my head. "No. It's nothing—I'm happy. I finally get to get out of this cage."

West walked over to me and put his hand on my shoulder. "I know it's hard, Nathan."

Nathan continued to look out the window. "She's married, you know."

West didn't even need to ask who "she" was. "I figured, son. You have to understand that she didn't know that you were going to wake up. Your progress… it wasn't looking well. When I ran the tests, it told me that the chances of you waking up…" West sighed. "There was no hope. That's why I was so surprised when you actually did. When the nurse ran to me and told me that you had woken up, I couldn't believe it. It was a miracle, Nathan."

I nodded my head.

"Think about it, Nathan. It was like you were dead. She had to let you go or she would've been miserable mourning after you."

I didn't want to hear it but I knew that every single thing he said was true. If Haley were in my position, if the tests had indicated that she would never wake up, I knew she would've wanted me to move on. She would've wanted me to be happy again.

But still, knowing that she was happy didn't ease the pain.

"Time will heal all." West squeezed my shoulder. "You can leave tomorrow morning."

"Thank you. You don't know how much I appreciate everything you've done."

"You're a good kid, Nathan. A fighter. I know you'll be happy again." With that, West left.

It was easier said than done.

…

That night I couldn't sleep. Part of me wanted to just leave right now instead of just waiting until the morning, but part of me wanted to stay here for as long as I could so I wouldn't have to face seeing her again.

God, I was in idiot. I was so naïve to think that everything would be back normal.

I made a complete fool of myself. She must've thought I was insane. I had to get my head out of the clouds and back into reality. Things didn't work like it did in the movies. People changed. People moved on. As much as it hurt, as much as I didn't want to, I had to, too.

Then I heard someone come in. I looked up. My heart skipped a beat. Why did she come back? Didn't she know that seeing her was just another stab through my heart? Didn't she know that she was torturing me? Knowing that I couldn't touch her, hold her, love her the way I've been wanting to for so long? And knowing that someone else was doing that instead? Seeing her made me angry and sad and hopeless all at the same time.

But damn it, she was so lovely. It was more than I could bear.

"Haley, what're you doing here?"

"I didn't mean to tell you like that," she said. "To blurt out that I was with someone else. It wasn't what I planned."

"Then what was the plan?" I said, a little too harshly.

She looked down for a moment. She then squeezed her eyes shut. "To be with you," she whispered. Then she looked up to meet my gaze. "To marry you and to buy a house together. To have kids and watch them grow up and have their own families." She smiled sadly. "To grow old together."

My heart broke with every word she said.

_Don't do this to me. Please_."Hales…"

Then all of a sudden with a strangled cry, Haley rushed towards me, drawing me into her arms, straddling my waist. And then she kissed me. Over and over again. And I kissed her back. I placed my hand on her neck forcing her closer to me, crushing my lips against hers.

"God, I love you," Haley breathed through our lips as she continued to kiss me. "I've missed you so much."

I let out a strangled moan and continued to kiss her. I shoved my hands under her shirt, wanting to feel more of her. Needing to feel her skin.

_She loved me._ I've been wanting to hear her say those words. Just for a slight second, just for a short moment, I was able to feel happy once again.

She trailed her lips down to my neck and I could feel myself becoming aroused. I didn't want her to stop. She kissed me again and this time it felt rushed. Pained. Desperate. I opened her mouth with my tongue to feel more of her, to taste more of her. It was like we were on a time limit and we had to take as much as we could get.

Five years of not being able to hold her. Five years of not being able to feel her touch, not being able to taste her…

How could something so wrong feel so right?

I wanted to tell her to never let me go. To stay with me forever. But I couldn't. She was with someone else and there was nothing I could do to change that.

It took all my strength to release my hold from her. "Haley. I can't do this."

Haley drew away reluctantly and forced herself to take slow and deep breaths. She tried to regain her control. But she couldn't.

"Nathan…" She leaned her forehead against mine for a while, placing her hands on either side of my neck. I didn't resist it, even though I should've. I let her hold me, just as she let me hold her. We embraced the silence, holding each other for what was going to be the last time.

"Haley, just go," I said, ever so softly. _Stay with me. Stay with me and never leave my side_.

She shook her head. "No, just let me—"

"Go. Please," I said, before I changed my mind, before I did something I would truly regret.

She got up off from the bed and headed towards the door. She turned so that she faced me. "Nathan, I—"

"Your husband must be waiting for you." I saw the pain in her eyes but she couldn't ever know the pain I felt saying those words, how hard it was for me knowing she was going home to someone else, how I was supposed to be the one waiting for her.

"Goodbye, Nathan." With that, she left. And I let her leave. I watched her walk away forever.

"Goodbye." I said although she was long gone. _I will always love you_.

…

Haley went inside her house, locking the door shut. She leaned against the door and closed her eyes, taking a deep breath. What the hell was she doing? It was wrong for her to do that, to just barge in there in the middle of the night and attack him. She didn't know what overcame her. As much as she wanted to regret what she did, she couldn't. It felt too good, felt too right to hold him again. To touch him. To feel him caressing her…

_You love him,_ her mind was telling her. She would always love Nathan. He was her first love, her first everything. But she couldn't just drop her life now to be with him. She made a promise to someone else, a duty.

"Hey."

Haley gasped and put a hand to her chest, alarmed. "Jake. You scared me," she said when she finally caught her breath.

Jake turned on the lights. "Where have you been?" He crossed his arms.

She looked at Jake, knowing how strong he was, how much he took care of her, and knowing how sweet and wonderful and charming he was. This was the man who saved her from the pain she couldn't bear feeling any longer. He had shown her a different type of love. He had made her happy. He made her forget, if only for a little while, the love that she had to tuck away.

But she knew more than anything, more than her own life, that he loved her way more than she would ever love him.

Yet he didn't deserve to be treated so unfairly, didn't deserve to be lied to.

"I, um, I went to Brooke's. I needed to talk to her." Haley bit her lip. It was wrong to lie to him. She knew it was but she was already damned when she stepped inside Nathan's hospital room just the day before.

"It must've been that serious. Enough for you go see her in the middle of the night." Jake walked to where she was so that he was standing right in front of her. "Haley, what's wrong?"

_Everything._ "Nothing," she said.

"Is it about Nathan?" he asked.

Her heart stopped. "How do you know about Nathan?" She asked a little too quickly.

"The whole town's talking about how he just got out of a five year coma. You told me he was a friend of yours right?"

"Yes—a friend."

Haley never told Jake about Nathan, about how he was her first love, about how he was her everything. She didn't know why but she felt like it wasn't his business. Or maybe she was just afraid that bringing up Nathan would just prevent her from moving on with Jake.

"Maybe you should go see him sometime. Maybe seeing an old friend would make you feel better." Jake smiled.

She nodded her head. He didn't know how much seeing Nathan meant to her. "Yeah. Maybe." She must've said or did something because Jake immediately frowned.

He reached out and took her in his arms. "Hey. You know you could talk to me right? About anything? If you feel like telling someone something or whatever, you know you could come to me."

She looked up and into his eyes. They weren't the hazy blues she was looking for. Instead, she found a pair of browns, just like hers.

"I know," she said.

He gave her a soft squeeze. "And if ever you need anything, I'm here. Okay?"

"Okay."

He leaned down to plant a kiss to her forehead. "It's just that lately you've been so sad. So distant. It's worrying me," he said, drawing his eyebrows together in a frown.

Haley moved so that Jake released his hold from her. "It's nothing. I think it's just the weather. You know how moody I get whenever there's no sun."

Jake looked into her eyes. He wasn't buying it. Any of it. But still, he nodded his head. "Okay."

"I'm gonna go to bed now. I'm pretty tired." Haley started toward the stairs.

"Haley," Jake called. She turned. "I love you," he said.

Haley smiled weakly and continued up the stairs.

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**AN: Yes, Haley is married to Jake Jagielski! And to M.A, to answer your reply, you have to realize that Nathan was good as dead, and it wasn't healthy for Haley to keep waiting for something that might not happen, or so she thought. And remember, this is a fictional story. But thank you for your review. It's good to know that true love is really out there. :)**


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